Wednesday, July 7, 2010
I knew this was coming. & just before I could avoid it, it happened. I knew my life was gonna change, but I didn't prepare for it in the first place. I'm starting to lose what I'm getting. I've got to choose between one & another. My bestfriend & a special someone. I admit, I've screwed things up pretty much. I never set my priorities right & I'm messing up my time with the people around me... Nonetheless, I just wanna note down how important these people are to me.My best, I'm trying to balance my time for you, work, family & girlfriends. I'm adapting to the situation & it's not easy, trust me. You won't understand cause you're not going through it. Believe me when I say, it is not easy. What more? Someone new is stepping in, things have to change. Still, I know it makes no excuse as to why I should push you aside. I never did, never intended to. Everything that's happened was out of my plans. I know it may look like I'm always there when I'm difficult & needs some help but I disappear as soon as things are better. But that wasn't & never have been the intention. All I need now is time to schedule myself & discipline my time. I've got work which finishes late, I've got someone who's starting to be pretty special for me, therefore, somethings have to be adjusted. Still, you shouldn't think that I'm putting you last - now that I'm getting easy on things. Instead, you should know that I love you & that putting you aside is the last thing I'd do....
I hope you'd consider this & gimme some time to settle shit with myself. It isn't about you or anyone else, it's just about me. I need to start managing my life now & balancing the time I have with my love ones, my friends & work. It's not an easy task.
To you, dear mister someone, please be mindful that every word you speak, is like a prayer. So, hope for the best & let's not rush.